tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2802926298833153382024-03-19T03:38:09.257-07:00It Is The RoadNancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.comBlogger199125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-64245445609510046492020-01-05T09:43:00.000-08:002020-01-05T09:43:37.393-08:00More Questions Than AnswersOn January 1, I shared that I felt by this point in my life I would have "more answers than questions."<br />
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I also confessed that fear has stopped me from blogging. The Lord has forgiven me for choosing fear and by faith I sit again at my computer, waiting to see what the Lord has to say today. When I start my time with the Lord, I start with a prayer asking Him to meet with me and then I turn on music. I usually choose a "suggested" playlist of worship music, then ask the Lord to give me a song to focus my thoughts on Him.<br />
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Today, the first song was "Weep With Me" by Rend Collective. I was about to skip it, the sound is a little melancholy. However, I decided to listen. The third line is "<b>I don't need answers</b>, all I need to know is that you care for me...Lord I will wrestle with your heart but I won't let You go." <i>(deep breath)</i><br />
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There you go, it is okay not to have answers (always). Some things we will release to the unknown. We choose to trust that God cares for us and rest in that truth. Yet, some things may be worth wrestling for. I am now content in having <i>more questions than answers</i>. How about you? Can you rest in not having the answer you desire? And if you are still restless will you persevere in seeking God, waiting for His answer? (Genesis 32:26)<br />
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We went to Canada this last weekend and toured the Parliament. This stained glass window "happened" to catch my attention (happened in quotes, since I am thinking there is purpose in every detail...another blog!). It says, "Great effects come of industry and perseverance."</div>
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I believe as we persevere in seeking God, He will allow us to be content in the unknown, or He will call us to persevere until He "answers" us. Either way, there is a "great effect." We will be closer to His heart, and isn't that our true longing? Ask away dear one, more questions than answers, what a good place to rest.</div>
Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-87356324531864487332020-01-01T21:36:00.000-08:002020-01-01T21:36:38.661-08:00January 1 - Starting AnewI've been wanting to blog for a long time now.<br />
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I have a theory (so many actually...). I think God has created each of us with a longing. A part of us that can only be fulfilled with one thing. For me, I believe that longing is for our Creator, God Himself. We all have tried to fill that longing with all the things of earth, chasing the wind, and while it may temporarily feel good, that desire is left unfulfilled.<br />
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Augustine wrote: You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it rests in you.<br />
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I also think that God created each of us with a way to commune with Him. We each have gifts, strengths, personality types, stories. For me, I connect with God most intimately when I blog. It is a process of working through a situation in my life or a desire to hear His voice or to make sense of a senseless situation. It is a time of worship and searching and resting in Him.<br />
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So why have I sat at this computer countless times just staring at that blinking cursor? To only walk away disappointed that the words won't be released from my fingers? When I shared this with someone yesterday, they suggested writing about not being able to write. I dismissed the idea. This morning though, the desire is still so strong, I figured, why not?<br />
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Why can't I write?<br />
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Fear<br />
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I don't think I knew that until I just asked myself that question, and waited for the answer...<br />
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Fear may be one of the biggest barriers in our longings being unfulfilled. By this age, I figured I would have more answers than questions, my life more "together" than falling apart, more clarity than confusion. What if I don't have anything to say, what if I say something that isn't true, what if my post is riddled with mistakes....what if (fill in the perpetual blank).<br />
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In my office at work is a large dry erase calendar. Each year it quickly gets filled with the details of managing an office. The week before Christmas, I order a new one for the new year. I put it up, and leave it completely blank from Christmas to the new year. I LOVE (like seriously....) having a completely blank calendar on my wall. For some, January 1st is just another day. For me, there is something fresh and hopeful about this day. The old is gone and the new is dawning. There is a clean slate and we can start anew.<br />
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How about you? How will you connect with God this year? What is hindering you? Will you take a few minutes now to sit quietly and listen. What is God revealing to you? I'd love to hear what He is telling you for 2020, I know He will meet you as you rest in Him!Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-55116987352276236612019-03-06T18:05:00.000-08:002019-03-06T18:05:13.008-08:00Lent 2019<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Today is Ash Wednesday, many don't understand or even know what that means. Though I grew up attending Ash Wednesday services, having a priest press the sign of a cross on my forehead with ashes, I don't know that I fully understand it either.<br />
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I do know it is a good time to pause in my walk of faith and reflect during this Easter season. There are approximately 40 days until we celebrate the most awesome day in history. Over the years I have paused during Lent (Ash Wednesday to Easter), giving up something or adding in something. Giving up chocolate, coffee, TV, etc. Adding a devotional, scripture reading, or blogging. At first, I think my motive was to honor my religious upbringing, it's just what we did, tradition. My motive has changed over the years, truly desiring to prepare my heart for Easter, for Jesus.<br />
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A few of us have chatted in the last few days, what will we do for Lent 2019? One Lenten season, I spent an hour every day with God and then blogged about it. It was one of my most meaningful experiences and it caused deep growth in my spiritual life. It was a difficult season, but that time with the Lord brought such healing and godly perspective. I have to admit, I've been nervous about trying anything like it since. What if it isn't as meaningful? What if I fail? What if... Can I just change that right now, what if I don't seek Him? My heart can barely stand the thought of not knowing Him more.<br />
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Last night our church presented a workshop called, "The Bible Reframed, God's Story Moves us from Misperceptions to Passion." The teacher shared the story of 4 blind men and the elephant. I think there are many versions of this, and that doesn't matter, the point is one blind man feels the tail and thinks an elephant is like a whip, one touches the leg and thinks an elephant is like a tree, another the ear, another the trunk. Each blind man decides what the elephant is by what he touches. So we also, with God's Word, decide who God is based on our limited interaction. We don't see (or seek?) the whole of who God is or the truth of who He is. We are content with knowing just a small part of Him, or a satisfied with a false version of who He is based on our own experiences or what we want out of God. Yikes...<br />
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I don't take the timing of attending this workshop as "coincidence" the night before Lent 2019 begins. As I prayed last night and this morning, I asked God to show me how to spend these next 6 weeks in light of what I heard in this class. How am I like the blind men, only "seeing" God in part? What truth have I been blind to? What misperceptions do I need to release?<br />
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I am committing these next six weeks to know God more, more fully, more accurately, with more passion. I will journal what God reveals and hopefully share some of those treasures.<br />
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There's a song playing in the background now, Simple Gospel, by United Pursuit, so good..."I want to know you, Lord, I'm laying down all my religion" ...and I will trade it for a deeper relationship with the One who already fully knows me.Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-84921622251588326312018-11-02T15:55:00.000-07:002018-11-02T15:55:40.211-07:00Becoming Free: Love Letter<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLL8FSnKsntRViUemiMG3hN4A1QUg0ro6CpXrizl49hIKaWKOBCwaeUV7JHnuQ7qgcNljOcHkVBu3py55moFHnIq-AzP7qJF02qr5dx5zgedgeg2PwoSMUjf28nvBWth0gwjeRY5QBSOo/s1600/flowersa.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="716" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLL8FSnKsntRViUemiMG3hN4A1QUg0ro6CpXrizl49hIKaWKOBCwaeUV7JHnuQ7qgcNljOcHkVBu3py55moFHnIq-AzP7qJF02qr5dx5zgedgeg2PwoSMUjf28nvBWth0gwjeRY5QBSOo/s200/flowersa.jpg" width="148" /></a></div>
The other day a friend walked into the office with these flowers. I could barely believe it when she said they were for me! It was October 24, not my birthday or any special event to celebrate. We actually don't know each other very well, but she said the Lord clearly told her to do this. She even confessed that she wasn't feeling well and had to make a significant effort to bring them to me.<br />
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I obviously received them with great joy, the picture does not do justice to the beauty of this arrangement. The colors, the detail, the texture. I walked her out to her car (to get the brownies she also made for me!) I shared some of my story and how God was using this to encourage me. I was still a little baffled why God would ask her to do this for me. There are so many others that have a deeper need for the encouragement. I decided to spend some time the next morning and ask God what He was showing me through this gift.<br />
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Well, the next morning was October 25. My dad's birthday. My parents have passed and I have grieved the loss. A while ago, I found a folded up note that my dad wrote to me. I decided to pull it out and read it once again. I can't remember when he gave it to me, but I am so glad I saved it.<br />
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Because of my daughters </div>
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I have a lot to crow about! </div>
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Dad 1:1</div>
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To my daughter Nancy</div>
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Just because</div>
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Love Dad<br />
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As I began to seek God and ask Him what He was showing me, He directed me to the song, <u>Nobody Loves Me Like You</u> by Chris Tomlin. <span style="text-align: center;">(</span><i style="text-align: center;">Morning, I see You in the sunrise every morning. It's like a picture that You've painted for me. A <b>love letter</b> in the sky. Story, I could've had a really different story, but You came down from Heaven to restore me. Forever saved my life. Nobody loves me like You love me Jesus....</i><span style="text-align: center;">)</span></div>
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As I pondered the bouquet, read this note from my dad, and listened to this song, the tears began to flow. I felt an overwhelming sense of God's great love for me, His never-ending faithfulness to care for me, and His remarkable provision in my life.<br />
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I realized in the last few weeks, I had slipped into looking at my circumstances first and not my God. I started down the road of comparing my life with others (warning: DON'T GO THERE!) My circumstances may not be ideal (really whose are?), but I truly believe I am right where God wants me.<br />
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My word for the year has been freedom, my heart longs to be fully free. I want to look back at this year and see how God has walked me down this road of freedom. These flowers reminded me of the full freedom I have in receiving God's love for me. He reminded me that no matter my circumstances, I am fully loved...it was like those flowers should have had a letter signed by God, just like my dad's letter. "To my daughter Nancy, just because, love God." That is FREEDOM! Living like and knowing that our Father loves us, not because of our abilities, or accomplishments, or accolades from others. Just because we are His. So simple and so powerful.<br />
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Extravagant love from a good, good Father. His reminders are all around us if we'll just look: a bouquet from a friend, the sunrise, the changing colors of fall, the majesty of the mountains, friendships, family, music, His Word (the ultimate love letter). Will you pause to look around and enjoy His love for you? Then walk in that freedom today!<br />
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Happy Birthday to my earthly father and thank you to my Heavenly Father for such a sweet reminder of your great love for me. <i style="text-align: center;">For you were called to freedom sisters... Galatians 5:13 </i>Rejoicing in our freedom!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-nwe7Ykybp98EefF61YO970lFKcrwU-uSzdwY_zaUHt942vfmzj_f-l-mcApG8y0aVmdaLzeqyu9Ed8G05k0vW5-CSKuA1bqSnkFB4RJdCBYm2u6WumQHo07J2436B96vEjfTbksMYiU/s1600/Pictures+of+Dad.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-nwe7Ykybp98EefF61YO970lFKcrwU-uSzdwY_zaUHt942vfmzj_f-l-mcApG8y0aVmdaLzeqyu9Ed8G05k0vW5-CSKuA1bqSnkFB4RJdCBYm2u6WumQHo07J2436B96vEjfTbksMYiU/s320/Pictures+of+Dad.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I couldn't pick one favorite photo of my dad...so here are some of my favorites~</td></tr>
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<br />Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-31915310432508315182018-01-04T08:52:00.000-08:002018-01-04T08:52:32.418-08:00What We Cannot SeeThe New Year is a time of reflection for me. I reflect back over the previous year and can see a little more clearly how things fell into place. My perspective on this side of my circumstances gives clarity. And quite frankly I can declare that 2017 is the past, not the present. Whether it was good or bad, it is over.<br />
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And now I ponder the New Year. Our pastor challenges us each year to set goals. I dug my feet in for a few years and finally submitted to the idea and gave it a try. I still am learning, but God has done some very cool things as I commit each year to Him and all that He has for me. Maybe I'll share those another day.<br />
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Right now, I want to share some wisdom a friend gave me yesterday. I shared with her that I had spent some lengthy time asking God for a verse for this year. The first two mornings of 2018 I woke early to spend time with the Lord. The first morning as I gazed out the window, there was a thick fog. I could only see maybe 50 feet out. The rest was pure white. There was no telling what was beyond. I felt like that was how this new year looked for me. I just don't know what is in store. Will it be joy? Sadness? Trials or Triumphs?<br />
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The next morning I again woke early, but even earlier. It was still pitch black, nothing at all was in sight. I turned on the porch light so I could see a few feet out, but beyond that, nothing was visible.<br />
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As I searched the scriptures, the Lord finally showed me the verse for the year. I realized that I still cling to fear at times. That I am not totally living free, though I long to. How is it possible to live free? I think the Lord is showing me that to live free, is to live by faith. Faith in the One that gave Himself up for me...<br />
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<i><b>"I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me, and delivered Himself up for me." </b></i> ~ Galatians 2:20<br />
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After I shared this process and verse with my friend she told me a story. She had been at Cannon Beach on a very foggy morning. Now if you don't know, Cannon Beach is famous for Haystack Rock. Here is a fun picture I took this summer. I don't know if you can tell, but that rock is HUGE.<br />
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In fact I just looked it up, it is 235 feet tall. Back to the story...my friend walked to the beach that foggy morning and took a picture of Haystack Rock. However, all that she could see was fog, it was that thick. She took the picture though because she knew Haystack Rock was in the fog, though not visible at all. She wanted to be reminded of a truth she realized. Even though she could not see what was beyond the fog, she knew what was there. Just like those two mornings I experienced, the fog and the darkness. We cannot see what is ahead, what is in front of us, but we do know Jesus is there.</div>
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This year is unknown to us. Sure we may have some plans in the works, but there is so much we do not know yet. We can speculate and worry about all that could happen, or we can fix our gaze on Jesus and ask Him to lead us through. We are equipped, armed, encouraged by all of the truth that is in God's Word for us. We know that the Lord will never leave us (Hebrews 13:5). He will accomplish what concerns us (Psalm 138:8). He is our Portion, our Deliverer, our Redeemer, our Strength, our Hope, our Joy, our Healer, our good, good Father. Do you see clearly now?</div>
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Am I asking us to put on happy faces and pretend life doesn't hurt? Absolutely not. That is living fake, not by faith. What I am asking is that when that "bad news" comes to us and life looks foggy or dark, that we choose to believe that God goes before us. That He sees beyond our circumstances and that He will walk closely with us through it all.</div>
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I don't know what this year has for you, for some of you, some big changes are coming that are overwhelming. You just can't see what is ahead and that may cause fear to well up. Can I ask you to join me in living by faith and not fear this year? While there is much we do not know, there is even more that we do know in Christ. This is the life I long to live, by faith in the Son of God who loves me.</div>
Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-30848339101603595812017-12-06T21:18:00.000-08:002017-12-06T21:18:01.001-08:00Prepare Him RoomSunday we had about a 4 hour gap in time. When you have a busy life, a gap in time can be like a gift of gold or a black hole. You know what I mean? Plowing through a long to do list feeling so accomplished or completely wasting it sitting on the couch staring at your phone.<br />
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I had a choice how to spend those few hours, my list of how they could be filled would have taken that long to write. I feel like my life is one long undone list right now. So what thing to cross off the list Sunday? The first Sunday of Advent. Wouldn't it be nice if I showed you my great advent wreath I created, or to share the wisdom of a beautiful devotion. No, I spent those precious hours cleaning out our attic. Really, that hits about #147 on my to do list, but why not randomly select something that definitely could have waited until next summer?<br />
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The motivation for this actually came from my son. We had cut down a Christmas tree the day before and didn't have time to put it up when we brought it home. (this sounds like a bad theme in my life...) Sunday we rearranged the living room to create a space for it. We ended up with too much furniture for our small space. I decided it would be a good idea to get rid of an old love seat that we had taken from my aunt's house when she moved to a nursing home. Daniel would not have it. He tried every which way to convince us to keep it. Did I mention it is missing a leg and it is white...who buys white love seats? I was getting slightly exasperated and stopped the conversation.<br />
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"We are getting rid of it, we don't need it, it's broken, and doesn't match anything else in our house." I said very matter-of-factly. Then a tear slowly escaped his eye. What in the world, why was he crying over this?<br />
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"It was Dee Dee's. I remember going to her house and sitting on this and looking out the window with Maggie (her beloved cat). I don't want to get rid of it." I hugged my son as I realized this was not about a worn out couch.<br />
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We have experienced an unusual amount of loss these last few years. And it takes its toll.<br />
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As much as I love to get rid of stuff, he won me over. I couldn't get rid of this tattered sofa. And then the light went on for him, "Let's clean the attic so I can make a hang out room or a music room and put it up there!"<br />
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So we went up and grabbed boxes of total random stuff that needed to be tossed. We filled the garbage can with trash and the back of the car with donations. The photo here includes a few of the treasures I still need to sift through!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJadnT3JOwRvYA0k2hgWa7sW7KVhQlLXVP9e3BOyEtTOGQGlCs8WQMa0SqWGPgEscyePFkpn7GJ87xnRXVZ8phuLY7LglHiCJ6XqrStyUJ64WiS2Lr0kmL5Vd0W61uj9crVstT_-qVQeE/s1600/20171205_191538.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJadnT3JOwRvYA0k2hgWa7sW7KVhQlLXVP9e3BOyEtTOGQGlCs8WQMa0SqWGPgEscyePFkpn7GJ87xnRXVZ8phuLY7LglHiCJ6XqrStyUJ64WiS2Lr0kmL5Vd0W61uj9crVstT_-qVQeE/s320/20171205_191538.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Some treasures from my attic :)</td></tr>
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We ended up taking off the 3 legs that were left on the love seat and carrying it up several flights of stairs. We spread out the carpet remnant and dusted the cobwebs away. It's pretty "rustic", the walls aren't finished and the floor under the patch of carpet is plywood. I have to admit though, it is pretty comfortable. It is a quiet space that Daniel loves...and calls his own.<br />
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So why am I telling you this story (besides confessing I have lots of issues)? Since Sunday I can't get the phrase out of my mind:<br />
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<b><i> Prepare Him Room</i></b><br />
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You know the Christmas Carol: Joy to the World! The Lord is come, let earth receive her King. Let every heart<i> prepare Him room</i> and heaven and nature sing.<br />
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Just as we prepare our homes to celebrate Christmas, with Christmas trees, lights, and decorations, we also prepare our hearts for Him.<br />
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As I think back through these last few years and some difficult moments, I can easily think that I didn't "need" the pain. Just like I didn't think we needed that old sofa. But as we prepared the attic, we noticed a perfect place for my aunt's love seat, it really fits perfectly, like it was made for that space.<br />
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And as I reflect on those words, prepare Him room...I see how He has allowed some brokenness into my life. Some things that just don't seem to belong. If I just look at my hurts, disappointments, grief as items that are worthless, then they are just occupying space in my life, treated as trash. However, if I truly want to prepare room in my heart for the Lord, I can look at these "tattered pieces" of my life with value. In His hands, He can re-purpose my pain for His glory, creating something I can value and share.<br />
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Joy to the world! The Lord has come into our lives to take the broken and make something beautiful. May we prepare Him room, room for healing and hope and peace and joy. Clearing away the shame and guilt through His forgiveness. And as He does His work in us and through us, we can sing with all creation and marvel at the wonders of His love.Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-5245882874519710172017-08-10T00:39:00.000-07:002017-08-10T00:39:17.025-07:00Perspective<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>I will lift my eyes to the mountains; from where shall my help come?</i></div>
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<i>My help comes from the LORD, who made heaven and earth.</i></div>
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<i>Psalm 121:1-2</i></div>
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It's a funny thing. Why do we want what we don't have? If we have straight hair, we want curly hair. When it's too hot outside we long for winter. When it has been grey for too many days in a row, summer cannot come soon enough. After we place our order at a restaurant, we want to change our mind as a delicious dish is delivered to the table next to us.<br />
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I know many lonely people that long for community, and yet I find myself (one steeped in a great community) longing for some time alone. I find guilt creeping in as I try to figure out how to escape the beautiful chaos that is my life just for a few moments. Tonight I took full advantage of a free 45 minutes to be alone. It was glorious and guilt free!<br />
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I dropped off the kids at an event and walked one of my favorite paths, Chambers Bay. Many of you know this route as it is one of your favorites as well. It sits on the shores of Puget Sound, with amazing views of several islands and on a good day the Olympic Mountains.<br />
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I asked the Lord to quiet my heart and allow me to hear from Him. My schedule (or scheduling) doesn't allow for much time to exercise...well, it probably does, I just haven't figured it out. The point is I don't exercise nearly as much as I'd like or need. This particular walk is a 3 mile circle. It takes you along the water, up a steep hill, along the road, and then back down to the water. The hills are challenging when you don't exercise daily! <br />
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When I came to the uphill section, I tried to figure out the most effective way to conquer it! I figured if I just focused on the pavement right in front of my feet that I would not get discouraged by how far I still had to go. Face down, focus, whatever you do, don't look at the hill!<br />
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But then Bebo Norman came on Spotify, with "I Will Lift My Eyes." And this face down plan wasn't cutting it, it was discouraging. So I listened to my pal Bebo (isn't that a great name?) and lifted my eyes. There was beauty all around, the sky was blue, the trees were green, birds were flying. It gave me perspective. The shade was a welcome friend on this 90+ degree day.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiZUX02tyJQFbxYvZuFocJFggStN650VUk1n8shcvyQwjkCaAfu6lepoP4nh3g5BZBZCTp02Fit6Ic46_c-2oOY7aWqVO5bsK6P5EjiEmFScYblJ9g2FMSxfcv9_y7gIW8hgnbAME1jCc/s1600/Chambers.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiZUX02tyJQFbxYvZuFocJFggStN650VUk1n8shcvyQwjkCaAfu6lepoP4nh3g5BZBZCTp02Fit6Ic46_c-2oOY7aWqVO5bsK6P5EjiEmFScYblJ9g2FMSxfcv9_y7gIW8hgnbAME1jCc/s200/Chambers.jpg" width="150" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">From my walk today</td></tr>
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My journey was so much more enjoyable, the struggle of the hill lost its weight as the scenery became more of my focus. I had a new perspective, a new point of view. You see where I'm going right? <br />
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Our journey with the Lord is similar. We hit the pavement running in the mornings, nose to grindstone. Our view is narrow, often only "seeing" our own circumstances, our own troubles. If we lift our eyes we gain a new perspective. We are not alone. There is more happening in our little corner of the world than we realized. Yes, there is sadness and trouble, but also joy and beauty!<br />
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Are you struggling? In a rut? Lost perspective? Lift your eyes. Look around. Breathe in. Pause. Breathe out. (Seriously, do it now, it really helps!) Maybe you don't want to see the uphill struggle you are facing. Ignoring it will not make it better...just sayin'. Keep moving forward friend.<br />
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Why do we want what we don't have? Maybe it is because we don't realize the greatness and depth of what is ours already. Lift your eyes and see all that is yours.Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-69531073778250567672017-01-10T22:02:00.000-08:002017-01-10T22:02:20.776-08:00Hopes For A Granddaughter<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7OaCiQFRpFKpvEpXSQ6LHa9YryzSP3i_ugrAWPxHIwj5VbKc30ankMKNvzwnkwVMWWWe4dgESwml9hZnGnTpLPFI6gu76zoyIYC_r9rQTH2phQ4j3PgsD6ZVcbOod0hMMPF_0so5QkbM/s1600/20170110_194730_HDR.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7OaCiQFRpFKpvEpXSQ6LHa9YryzSP3i_ugrAWPxHIwj5VbKc30ankMKNvzwnkwVMWWWe4dgESwml9hZnGnTpLPFI6gu76zoyIYC_r9rQTH2phQ4j3PgsD6ZVcbOod0hMMPF_0so5QkbM/s200/20170110_194730_HDR.jpg" width="150" /></a>This is Eugene Bal Jr., which means there was a Senior and proudly, there is a III. This is my dad when he was a young and playful boy on Maui. Today is his second day in heaven. Our second day without him, which of course causes deep reflection on his legacy.<br />
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My dad wasn't perfect and his early adult years were a little bumpy. He was strict and worked a lot. He was a Colonel in the Air Force and I remember having to say "Yes Sir". He wasn't all serious either though. We have many pictures of merry Christmases and joyful vacations. He had a strong work ethic and enjoyed relaxing (a difficult balance I find).<br />
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When I was in high school, he received Jesus as Lord of his life and there were some major changes. He became one of the most tender and compassionate men I have ever known. He made drastic lifestyle changes that honored God and his family. He would openly cry when his heart broke for the hurting, the prisoner, the downcast. He also perfected being stingy and generous all at once. He bought shoes from Kmart, but would be the first to write a check for a mission trip.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhd9NrlMBD-aeZl1mBm63aOgYKTxi6_nr4q15ZI3x-VcI7a047whQ0R1uK8tAx5eRfE1R1XtGe-8F9WKowQGr56aKKHX7uhBloeKBXuIlYGRE9FmGUMA05LWD94nfGAvlmYDAfynYUA-Z4/s1600/20170110_194507_HDR.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhd9NrlMBD-aeZl1mBm63aOgYKTxi6_nr4q15ZI3x-VcI7a047whQ0R1uK8tAx5eRfE1R1XtGe-8F9WKowQGr56aKKHX7uhBloeKBXuIlYGRE9FmGUMA05LWD94nfGAvlmYDAfynYUA-Z4/s200/20170110_194507_HDR.jpg" width="150" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Tutu and Julia</td></tr>
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I could go on and on, but for now, I really want to share a letter he wrote. When Julia was born I asked both of my parents to write letters to her. Hopes that they had for her. My mom had some health struggles at the time, so she chose some very meaningful photos and didn't write very much. My dad though wrote the most beautiful letter I've ever read. This was who he had become and that is one of the reasons I loved him so. He didn't live in the regrets of the past, but chose to live well the life he had left. When we shared about him tonight at dinner, this was one of Julia's favorite moments...this letter. <br />
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit;">Dear Julia Grace,</span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-family: inherit;">I never really spent time with your mom, aunties or uncles like I have with you. I guess I was "too busy". I never really expressed any hopes I had for them either. Now it's time to change, so here goes:</span></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLA2TO6VhzpQJgWju8sLSBXRrm9wCmEmJ7JCdiMT0Rqhf2MwNJ3SKH7TMABd0H7KtFTgCHGQWlavW6-jqgp8ccCvEJcKmiwV4bbhgP-3BqD6-w4kbeksuDK1UnBAXKpj5D5SAkXeEf5qs/s1600/20170110_194718_HDR.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLA2TO6VhzpQJgWju8sLSBXRrm9wCmEmJ7JCdiMT0Rqhf2MwNJ3SKH7TMABd0H7KtFTgCHGQWlavW6-jqgp8ccCvEJcKmiwV4bbhgP-3BqD6-w4kbeksuDK1UnBAXKpj5D5SAkXeEf5qs/s400/20170110_194718_HDR.jpg" width="300" /></a><b><span style="font-family: inherit;">I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books. I hope you learn to make your own bed and wash the car. And I really hope nobody gives you a brand new car when you are sixteen. I hope you have to walk to school with your friend and that you live in a town where you can do it safely. When you learn to use computers, I hope you learn to add and subtract in your head. I hope you get teased by your friends when you have your first crush and when you talk back to your mother that you learn what Ivory soap tastes like. I don't care if you try beer once, but I hope you don't like it. I sure hope you make time to sit with your Grandpa and I hope you will come to know Jesus a lot sooner than I did. These things I wish for you - tough times and disappointment, hard work and happiness. To me it's the only way to appreciate life.</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></b></div>
<b><span style="font-family: inherit;"> Written with a pen. Sealed with a kiss. Tutu</span></b><br />
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<i>You make know to me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy; </i></div>
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<i>at your right hand are pleasures forever more. Psalm 16:11</i></div>
Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-17165973598173629002017-01-01T18:44:00.000-08:002017-01-01T18:44:43.466-08:00Importunity<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Each new year I ask the Lord to give me a verse, or word for the year. A direction for my spiritual life. He has been faithful to give me one each time I ask. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I have a favorite place to sit and meet with the Lord in my house. I am intentional to be free from distractions (no piles and projects in sight). It is a small space with a sweet view. This may sound weird, but there is an old rocking chair there in front of where I sit, I imagine the Lord sitting and talking with me. Sometimes I sit quietly, and many times, not so quietly as I pour out my concerns to Him.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Anyway, (see how distracted I can become!) I went to my favorite spot and asked the Lord for my 2017 verse. He led me through my maze of thoughts and ideas until we stopped at the word - <i>importunity</i>. It was in the margin of my Bible as I was reading about seeking God. I looked up the definition and found: shamelessness, persistence, insistence, over-eagerness. It doesn't sound so noble, sounds annoying actually. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The only place it is found in the Bible is Luke 11:8</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><i>I tell you, even though he will not get up and give him anything because he is his friend, yet because of his persistence he will get up and give him as much as he needs.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Jesus is telling a story. There is this guy and a friend of his comes for a visit and they have no food. Being that the local grocery store is probably closed, he goes to another friend's house. He bangs on the door and says, "Hey, I need food, a friend has come for a visit and we have nothing". The home owner says, "It's midnight! Go away, we are already in bed!" This guy is not getting up for any reason. Yet because of the persistence (or importunity) of this man, the guy gets out of bed and gives him as much as he needs.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">This parable has often bothered me, I was raised to be polite. I would never knock on my neighbor's door insisting he give me food in the middle of the night. How can it be okay to whine to God about our needs, even if they are for another? That just isn't how it is done. You figure it out yourself, find another neighbor, look further back in your cupboard, find some other way.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">God definitely had my attention here. I looked up the biblical definition of importunity and found this: if by shameless insistence a favor may be won, even from one unwilling and ungracious, still more surely will God answer the earnest prayer of His people. God's willingness to give exceeds our ability to ask. The parable teaches by way of contrast, not parallel.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">What I found was that in contrast to the irritated home owner, God is a good Father, desiring to give us what we earnestly seek. We only need to ask, seek, and knock...as the next verse instructs. And this is where I found my 2017 verse.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><i>And I say to you, ask, and it shall be given to you; seek, and you shall find; knock, and it shall be opened to you. </i> Luke 11:9</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAR8hGvSTISvP8Pzvb219NMLPgjV1cXF92Rb3EOeAalS4GoDTJTEj3lLv1ZpMyOz1tmgZp-B7R6fIFEOON_dHKZt5cOg0hfFXCCkrSJ9f621QEM_55ViBjvqTHinbLodntnoTqb91_kZU/s1600/go+explore.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="268" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAR8hGvSTISvP8Pzvb219NMLPgjV1cXF92Rb3EOeAalS4GoDTJTEj3lLv1ZpMyOz1tmgZp-B7R6fIFEOON_dHKZt5cOg0hfFXCCkrSJ9f621QEM_55ViBjvqTHinbLodntnoTqb91_kZU/s320/go+explore.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Literally this verse says, keep asking, keep seeking, keep knocking ....shamelessly. We cannot irritate God by our persistent prayers. In fact I think He delights in them because He loves us. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Andrew Murray said, "How all nature has been arranged by God that in sowing and reaping, as in seeking coal or gold, nothing is found without labor and effort." </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And I wonder if that is what prayer is, what prayer does. The answer to our prayers is not the goal. The answer is a by-product of a life lived in communion with the Lord. Prayer brings us to our rightful place, as we humble ourselves, empty ourselves of our own agendas, plans and inadequate solutions. Those things are crucified with Christ, so it is no longer I who live, but Christ in me. We ask, we seek, we knock. And the door is opened to the way of the Lord. His plan, His will, His purpose. His presence. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">So my goal this year? Not to be so polite with God. I will shamelessly, persistently, eagerly, unapologetically...ask, seek, and knock until He answers. And then I will keep asking, keep seeking, and keep knocking some more.</span>Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-3243499099917921502016-10-30T21:09:00.000-07:002016-10-30T21:29:25.239-07:00When<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEietw8r6eJWj65VC9zvALQziCwHrHNF9yjN5vJ12vzktyLZP12k8jauXQ7-ETtyhZC-F-4GPVWZvRwgbWP947ZnKYeiSEp6gepKBFsRdR6l7JvYutQ62and72539Z4mOySGiJwmZuJyBQ4/s1600/When.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="165" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEietw8r6eJWj65VC9zvALQziCwHrHNF9yjN5vJ12vzktyLZP12k8jauXQ7-ETtyhZC-F-4GPVWZvRwgbWP947ZnKYeiSEp6gepKBFsRdR6l7JvYutQ62and72539Z4mOySGiJwmZuJyBQ4/s200/When.png" width="200" /></a></div>
The other morning I was reading in Deuteronomy. Verse 1 from Chapter 20 caught my attention:<br />
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<i>"When you go out to battle against your enemies and see horses and chariots and people more numerous than you, do not be afraid of them; for the LORD your God, who brought you up from the land of Egypt, is with you."</i><br />
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I read verses like this and often laugh out loud (probably not the typical reaction!). Here is Israel, a rebellious lot at best. Yet they are God's own possession. They are dearly loved. The Lord is giving instructions for war. I hear something like this: <br />
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So Israel, when you go to battle, you are going to see the odds stacked high, like really high against you. You are going to face your enemies, people that want to destroy you, there are going to be so many that you will not be able to begin to count them. Oh and by the way, they will have horses and chariots...you can't win. My advice, my command, don't be afraid.<br />
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As I was thinking through this scenario I was reminded of some other "when" verses in the Bible. When you pass through the waters and through the rivers...when you walk through the fire, Isaiah 43:2. When you hear of war, Luke 21. When you meet trials of various kinds, James 1:2.<br />
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This life is so unpredictable, yet we do know we will face hardships. </div>
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It is not a question of IF we will, but a command for WHEN we do.</div>
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Our human reaction often is fear, worry, doubt. Fear draws us away, we run, hide, retreat. We are paralyzed, consumed by the situation. So if we are not to fear, what do we do? How do we obey this command when we face the "whens" in our lives? When your finances fail, when there is a terminal diagnosis, when a heart breaks, when God is silent....when. <br />
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I wonder if we are to do the opposite? Fear makes us want to give up. Faith causes us to draw near, be vulnerable, be honest, run to Him. I looked up antonyms for fear and this is what I found: assurance, calmness, cheer, confidence, contentment, encouragement, faith, happiness, joy, trust, love, courage.<br />
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How do you want to live? Paralyzed? Fearful? Stressed? I want to live in complete <i>assurance</i> of who I am in Christ, with <i>confidence</i> that He will keep His promises (He will never leave us!), <i>encouraged</i> by the family of God, <i>trusting</i> in the One who allowed me to be in this situation.<br />
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How about you? Are you in a circumstance that seems overwhelming? No way to win? No way out? I have tried both paths. Run, fear, hide, avoid, distract...anything but face the giant. And I have asked God for help and have chosen the path of faith and courage. My hope is that <i>when </i>I face my next battle I will obey His command and choose the path of faith, not fear. It is so much better. There is freedom found in the faith-filled life. And I choose to live free.<br />
<br />Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-92047076687356961932016-05-10T22:26:00.000-07:002016-05-11T07:53:52.317-07:00Goodbyes<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I'm not so great at goodbyes. And I am not very fond of them. I have had plenty of practice. I said at least six goodbyes as we moved from houses, friends, and neighbors by the time I reached Junior High. I think it may have been easier being the one leaving. Now I am on the other end as the one staying. Staying on this side of heaven. Staying in my city. Staying at our church. So many goodbyes. <br />
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I wonder if I could be better at this? I don't think I'll ever like them. Maybe I can think a little more like Winnie the Pooh though. Ponder how grateful I am to have someone that makes saying goodbye so difficult. The answer for sure is not isolation, to run from ever having to say goodbye again. Though the thought has crossed my mind.<br />
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There has to be an antidote to the sadness of saying goodbye. I wonder if Pooh bear actually was right? Maybe being thankful will take the sting away. I am beyond grateful that I had my mom for so many years, thankful that she created fond memories with my kids. Thankful for her legacy and her prayers. I am so glad to have worshiped and served with many military families at our church. Thankful for their insights in bible studies and sweet conversations. How wonderful my life has been because of these fleeting friends.<br />
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I took a pause in this blog. I started this yesterday and decided to walk away and pray. I asked God what was going on in my heart. Have you ever felt something and didn't quite understand what was going on? What God was showing you?<br />
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This morning I woke up and I think God is showing me something about regret. When someone leaves, we can start playing the regret game. You know the one. It's not a very fun game. All the "if only"'s are drawn from the deck of regrets. One of my life goals is to live life without regrets. Pretty sure that is not possible! God definitely is growing me in this area as I desire to please Him above all others. And that is a life without regrets. <br />
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So I am working on a new game. When I have to say goodbye, I will have two decks (not literal, who has time for that, virtual if you will...) One deck will be thankful cards: I will consider all the ways I can be thankful for that person or family. And the other deck (that I may actually make...) God's Word: Scriptures that set my eyes on Jesus, not the "if only"'s. My regrets are the enemy's way of distracting me from pressing on and going towards my goal of living a life pleasing God, one without regret.<br />
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So back to goodbyes. Can we say goodbye without feeling any regret? (I should have taken more pictures, I should have spent more time, If only I had....) I really just don't know. I do know that we can choose what thoughts to entertain. Forgetting what lies behind (those things that entangle us - like regrets), and strain forward to what lies ahead (gratitude, good memories, all we have in God Himself). As we say goodbye let's fill our hearts with thankfulness. The more we can pour in, the more the regrets get pushed out. And maybe the sting won't be so deep. Goodbyes are here to stay until Jesus returns, I guess we'd better figure out how to do them well.<br />
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Here are some verses we can add to our new way of saying goodbye:<br />
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1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. <i>(notice it says give thanks "in" all circumstances, not "for" all...hmmmmm)</i><br />
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Romans 12:2 Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.<br />
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Psalm 34:4-5 I sought the Lord, and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to Him are radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed. <br />
<br />Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-15391563282540939162016-05-06T21:00:00.000-07:002016-05-06T21:00:54.191-07:00To my retreat girls (part B)....<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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So this is the inside of my refrigerator. I opened it up this morning and found my vitamins. (Yes, they are gummy. No, you may not make any comments about the fact that I justify eating candy in the form of vitamins every morning, we all have our weaknesses!)<br />
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I had taken them about 30 minutes earlier and I have NO idea how they wound up in my fridge. I have never put them there before. Didn't I just say at the retreat how easily we are distracted? I even said, "Do any of you ever put your phone in the fridge and try to plug in your milk?"<br />
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I was wondering why in the world I did this and then I realized I was distracted (and didn't even know it). I asked the Lord why I was so "worried and bothered". He gently reminded me about yesterday. I shared with you that I had a burden that I took to the feet of Jesus. Apparently I forgot to leave it there. I had picked it back up, threw it over my shoulder, and marched on with my day. Somehow to my surprise it was weighing me down this morning.<br />
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I went back to the Lord and gave it to Him again...with tears, this time lots more tears. Why do we so desperately want our own way? I have some pretty great ideas and it baffles me that the Lord doesn't use them. (please hear the sarcasm!) In His gentle way He asked me how in the world He can make this beautiful if I keep taking it back from Him. So I find myself back at His feet, giving Him this unmet expectation. This unrealized dream. I do believe I told you all that Drawing Near is not easy. And now I am living it. Please tell me you struggle too. Somehow this is easier knowing we are not alone.<br />
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I love the truth that God gave us: Drawing Near is an invitation and lifelong pursuit. It is not something to check off our to do list. It is about humility and obedience and worship. It is about a relationship with the One who has all we need. Who is all we need. So I will try this again and see how tomorrow goes. His mercies are new every morning...good thing, I need them every day!<br />
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<i>For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be the glory forever. Amen</i></div>
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<i>Romans 11:36</i></div>
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<br />Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-54311009467227876782016-05-05T16:54:00.000-07:002016-05-06T08:45:55.663-07:00To my retreat girls...<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My shelf of remembrance...</td></tr>
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Last weekend the Lord saw fit to have me share His story at our annual Women's Retreat. It was my great joy to take on the "role" as retreat speaker. Those of you that were there know why "role" is in quotation marks!<br />
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I so loved being able to share truth, the Truth. I have no regrets, God was faithful and answered every one of my prayers. However, I feel as if there is more to say. I am thinking about saying it in the form of letters to you. Oh, if you were not at the retreat, you can listen in also. I do have to admit though, these girls stole my heart. They are beautiful, broken, sweet women that desire to Draw Near to the only One worthy of our affection. I am buoyed by their faith and this weekend will always be a fond memory of mine.<br />
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Several of you shared that you could relate to Mary. Remember, we heard that one sister was <i>named </i>Martha and the other <i>called</i> Mary. And Mary means "bitter". There was something that happened in Mary's life that caused others to call her bitter. I want you to remember too though that she did not stay bitter and I think it was because she stayed at the feet of Jesus. The Lord filled her as she drew near and she was able to worship Him for who He really was. He changed her. <br />
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I came home from the retreat with an expectation that was unmet. I shed a few tears today (not due to menopause - yet...but because He is tenderizing my heart). I think He shed a few tears with me as He comforted me. I placed this burden at His feet and am trusting Him to do something beautiful. I am able to worship, even in my disappointment because I can trust Him. And I think this is one way to guard against bitterness. Worship. One definition of worship is "adoring reverence". This requires love and trust. Do you love the Lord? Do you trust Him?<br />
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Some of you feel bitterness is leaking out of your lives and not Jesus. Could it be that He is asking you to trust Him in the midst of your circumstances? Could it be that by faith you will worship Him, give Him His rightful place in your life? Remember the pitcher that I held up high, representing Him? If He is not lifted high, how can He pour all that we need into us? Please allow Him to complete the work He began in you at the retreat. Come just as you are. Stay at His feet and let worship replace any bitterness that is still leaking out.<br />
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<i>And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who seek Him. Hebrews 11:6 </i></div>
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<br />Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-68540231196951382772016-04-06T09:40:00.000-07:002016-04-06T11:42:04.098-07:00Valley of Deep DarknessWhy Lord? <br />
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Have you felt darkness closing in? Maybe it crept in slowly, pulling the oxygen slowly out of the room. Or maybe it came on so suddenly, it quickly took all of your breath away in an instant.<br />
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Either way, we find it hard to breathe through the pain and we ask God, why?<br />
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I could give several answers, all biblical, why this is allowed. But would that help? Maybe. However, while we are walking through the "valley of the shadow of death", mini sermons or debates about God's Sovereignty may not offer the comfort we so desperately need.<br />
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For generations God's people have turned to Psalm 23 for relief from heartache.<br />
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<i>The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.</i><br />
<i> He makes me lie down in green pastures.</i><br />
<i> He leads me besides still waters.</i><br />
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There is tenderness in this Psalm of David. He knew the importance of a shepherd's care over his sheep. This is very personal for David. I imagine he is writing this at a very dark time in his life, verse 4 says:<br />
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<i>Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, </i><br />
<i> I will fear no evil, for You are with me; </i><br />
<i> Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.</i><br />
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The phrase "valley of the shadow of death" is also translated, "valley of deep darkness". Oh our wounded hearts, how so many of us have experienced deep darkness. But wait, there is a treasure here in this verse that we just cannot miss.<br />
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Did you notice in verse 1 (also in 2 and 3), David is talking <i>about</i> the Lord. It's like he is reminding himself of the truth of who God is. <i>The LORD</i> is my shepherd. <i>He</i> leads me beside quiet waters. <i>He </i>restores my soul. And then we come to verse 4, David shares his burden with the Lord. <i>I am walking through deep darkness. Please God, help me breathe again.</i><br />
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And then it happens.<br />
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David says, I will fear no evil, for <i>You </i>are with me. He has gone from talking about the Lord to talking to the Lord. It is ever so slight, but ever so powerful. I feel like the movie score has transitioned from a sad melody into a song of triumph. Like the first ray of the rising sun breaking the darkness of night. Hope has come. The Lord's presence is so palpable, he talks <b>to</b> Him instead of <b>about</b> Him.<br />
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<i>You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; </i><br />
<i> You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.</i><br />
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I believe with all of who I am, that God is good. And here is one more proof of His goodness. In the original language, part of the translation for anoint, is "take away ashes from sacrifice". <br />
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The Lord takes the ashes of our sacrifice of brokenness and creates beauty. Then He reaches back down and anoints us with the very same sacrifice. Our experience becomes our anointing. This burden will have purpose, it will not be wasted.<br />
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We may not be able to see the beauty right away, and walking through the valley of deep darkness may take longer than we desire. You may feel hopeless. Our feelings aren't always reliable though. God's Word is and so is verse 6:<br />
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<i>Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, </i><br />
<i> and I shall dwell in the house of the LORD forever.</i><br />
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The truth is that goodness and mercy are near and will be your companions all the days of your life. And as a child of God our future is secure.<br />
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I imagine David being so distraught in his pain, his face in his hands, the tears streaming. Hopeless. He recounts what he knows is true of the Lord. He pours out his heart, sharing his burden. Then slowly he lifts his face. Truth floods in and he sees that the Lord is near.<br />
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Turning darkness to light, hurt to hope, death to life.<br />
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Whatever your burden today, may you pour it out to the Lord. Recount what you know is true of Him. Then, like David, may you lift your face and see that the Shepherd is near. Your sorrow will not be wasted, He has purpose for you, an anointing. This valley of deep darkness will end and He will restore your soul.<br />
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May you release your "why Lord?" as a sacrifice, trusting Him to bring beauty instead of ashes, in His time.<br />
<br />Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-20032554673252528762016-02-28T22:19:00.000-08:002016-02-29T06:57:54.365-08:0040 Day Journey - (meant it for good)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Days 1-16 are behind me on this 40 Day Journey through Lent. Almost each day I have given an hour of my "own" time to spend with the Lord in His Word. Genesis is checked off my list and I wanted to give a short synopsis of what God revealed. <br />
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I have read Genesis several times, so many of the people and the places were familiar. Abraham was one of my favorites and continues to hold that spot. <br />
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A few things bothered me and some still perplex me (Lot's wife being turned into a pillar of salt and Jacob wresting with an angel?). I was thinking through from Chapter 1 verse 1 to chapter 50 verse 26. What did God teach me in this time? <br />
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In Chapter 1, we read of the creation of the world. It is remarkable. A miracle. Awesome really, like seriously, can you imagine watching those days unfold? I recently had a great conversation with a friend. We were talking about some serious things. I asked her why we were created. (Spoiler alert: I don't know...) As I read through chapter one I noticed that almost every day after God created something these words are written: <i>And God saw that is was good</i>.<br />
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In fact Genesis 1:31 says that after God was done, He saw all that He had made, "<i>...and behold, it was very good</i>." (I want to start using that word again - behold - such anticipation!) <br />
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So can we deduce that God made us, because it was good? We know He is good, it's who He is (as my pal Chris Tomlin says). This is what He does, He does good. Now if you've read through Genesis before, you know some pretty bad things happen. People prove to be, well...not good. There are liars, deceivers, murderers, adulterers, thieves. In fact at one point, God wipes out the whole earth save a remnant in Noah and his family.<br />
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Despite our "badness", it doesn't change God's goodness. Yes, He deals with sin, but it is because He is good. Genesis opened with God's goodness and we see it again at the close of Genesis. Joseph is one of 12 brothers and the least liked. There may be a few reasons why, but they don't justify his brothers selling him as a slave and telling their father he is dead. Most of you know this story, this true story. God was with Joseph for the 20 years that he was away from his family. He was a slave, he was put in prison, he was raised in a foreign land away from his family. And yet when he is divinely reunited with his brothers, he says:<br />
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<i>"And as for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good in order to bring about this present result, to preserve many people alive."</i> Genesis 50:20<br />
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Though Joseph was betrayed by his bothers and lived in some difficult circumstances, he was able to declare that God had meant all of this for good. Do you see that word, "meant"? The verse doesn't say God took the mess Joseph's brothers made and turned it into good. It says God "meant it for good". That word "meant" literally means "to weave" in the original language. God has been weaving His story together for thousands of years, and it is a good story.<br />
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If you are struggling, or if you need a morsel of truth today, God is good. Cling to this truth. What is happening in your life is part of a grander plan, a beautiful story that God is weaving together. Even if you can't see goodness right now, it is there, because God is here. He is our good, good Father. And He is perfect in all of His ways to us.Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-16260369340742378502016-02-20T21:10:00.000-08:002016-02-20T21:10:47.824-08:0040 Day Journey Days 7 & 8<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I am definitely slowing down in my reading. I was so excited to get going that I blazed through the first part of Genesis. Maybe because it wasn't as complicated...but boy, now, these chapters. We are a hot mess. It is a wonder God continues to put up with us. </div>
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Day 7 I read Genesis 27-28. Isaac is now old and his eyes too "dim" to see. Isaac knows his days are numbered and this may be the only chance to take care of some family business. He calls in Esau and makes a private plan to bless him. </div>
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Back two chapters we read that the Lord told Rebekah she would have twins and that the older would serve the younger. In the same chapter we see Esau sell his birthright to Jacob. We also see that Isaac loved Esau, because he had a taste for game. And now here we are, Isaac isn't sure the time of his death and he wants to override Gods plan with a savory meal to boot. </div>
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You know what happens next, Rebekah overhears this plan and comes up with her own act of deception. She tells Jacob to pretend to be Esau and receive the blessing that even God Himself said was his. Jacob doesn't think this is a good idea and is fearful of receiving a curse instead of the blessing. In Genesis 27:13 she says, "....Your curse be on me, my son; only obey my voice..." </div>
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What I noticed in this chapter were all the opportunities for Isaac to figure out this was Jacob not Esau. Jacob comes into his dad's room and says, "My father" his dad answers, "Who is it?" Jacob of course lies and says he is Esau and he is here with the food and ready for the blessing. </div>
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Isaac also wonders how the food was prepared so quickly. He asks to touch his son's skin to make sure it is hairy - since Esau was so hairy and Jacob was not. Isaac even says, the voice is not Esau. He asks him again directly, "Are you really my son Esau?". And finally he asks for a kiss so he will lean in and Isaac can smell him. He had all of these doubts, all of these signs that this was trickery. Yet I think Isaac was so caught up in trying to get the blessing secretly to Esau that he continued down his slippery slope.</div>
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The irony? Isaac and Rebekah, even Esau and Jacob were secretive, deceitful, selfishly trying to get their own way. Yet God's plan was not thwarted. </div>
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I am trying to figure out why they just didn't do it God's way. Why did they allow in the sin crouching at their door? Their joy was stolen and a web of lies was woven. But then if I take a look at my own life, my own circumstances, maybe I am not so different. </div>
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Is there a situation that I feel the need to control? Do I trust God with my future? Is fear directing my steps into deceit? How easy it is to move our eyes away from God's beautiful, faithful promises and onto our less than desirable circumstances. </div>
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God gave Isaac several chances to change his mind and repent. Not only were his eyes dim, but his view of God was dim also. And this is part of the legacy he was leaving to Jacob. We all sin, we all fall short, we all need a redeemer. Thankfully One is on the way.</div>
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Day 8 I read and reread Chapter 28-29. I think I was still reeling a little from all the grief from chapter 27. And now we see more bad choices. Jacob is sent away, Esau takes a 3rd wife. Jacob falls in love with Rachel and is deceived (here we go again) and is given Leah as a wife instead. See, I told you we are a hot mess! This is a beautiful and heartbreaking story. My favorite verse is from Genesis 29:31</div>
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<i>Now the LORD saw that Leah was unloved and He opened her womb...</i></div>
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Can you imagine being Leah? The older sister, looked over for her younger sister. Her dad had to deceive a man into marrying her and she was still unloved though married. <i>But the LORD saw</i>...and then He did something beautiful. He brought new life. She conceived and would have a son. </div>
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God brings new life to where there was once despair. Hope in the midst of hurt. He saw. And then He did something. Not only do we have a God who sees, but One who acts on our behalf. Praise Him.</div>
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Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-10461183730232219672016-02-17T22:25:00.000-08:002016-02-18T06:34:25.652-08:0040 Day Journey - Day 6 (repeat)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I'm a day behind on my blogging, but current on my reading...hope to catch up this week. Yesterday I read Genesis 23-26. Reading about Isaac's life and the choices he makes is like reading about Abraham all over again. God could have put "ditto" in these chapters. Here is a list of a few of the similarities I noticed:<br />
<ul>
<li>They lived in Canaan</li>
<li>Both were rich</li>
<li>They built an altar and called on the name of the Lord</li>
<li>Told Abimelech (a title) that their wife was their sister to protect their own lives</li>
<li>Wives were both beautiful</li>
<li>God promised them that their descendants would be as numerous as the stars</li>
<li>There was a famine in the land</li>
<li>Abraham prayed for God to heal the women that were barren, Isaac prayed for his wife Rebekah because she was barren</li>
<li>God healed these women after they prayed</li>
<li>Abraham and Isaac's two firstborn children were sons that did not get along</li>
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Now some of this you could chalk up to the regular similarities in families: social class, location, marriage and kids. But they both lied to the king of Gerar and said their wives were their sisters. They both did this for fear of losing their own lives, thinking the king would want their beautiful wives for himself. Both times this is after God told them they would have as many descendants as the number of stars!<br />
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I am trying to wrap my head around this. We just read a few sentences in context of the whole Bible and we think, why do these people struggle so much? Why don't they get it? God's got this. But as we try to put ourselves in their circumstances we might realize how similar we are. <br />
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Isaac, while one of the Patriarchs, didn't have an easy life. His dad bound him on an altar and lifted a sword to sacrifice him. He had a difficult, at best, relationship with his older 1/2 brother. Both of his parents had died. It took 20 years for his wife to get pregnant. His twin boys did not get along. And now there is a famine in the land. Not an ideal life. <br />
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Instead of going to Egypt for food, God tells Isaac to stay in Gerar. And he obeys. He is now living among the Philistines, who must be pretty horrible if Isaac fears for his life. I wonder if Isaac's eyes had drifted from looking up at the stars, remembering God and His promises. And now they are on his difficult circumstances. Had his dad warned him about Gerar,or the people there? Did Isaac have fear already instilled in him? I can't get over this generational sin...<br />
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No matter how they arrived there, we know that fear is not from God. Are you fearful of someone or some circumstance? Maybe you can look up into the night sky (or imagine it if it is cloudy where you are too) and see those same stars shown to Abraham and Isaac. And remember Genesis 18:14 when Isaac is promised to Sarah and God says, "Is anything too difficult for the LORD?"<br />
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No, nothing is too difficult, even changing your legacy. If you have some sin that keeps repeating in your family, ask God to intervene, acknowledge that you need His help. As we depend on Him, He can rewrite our story instead of us repeating past mistakes.<br />
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Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-81201966956378578172016-02-16T05:39:00.000-08:002016-02-16T06:15:14.147-08:0040 Day Journey - Day 5 (We are invited)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Today I read Genesis 20-22. Chapter 21 is the birth of Isaac, the long awaited promised son. Chapter 22 is when God asks Abraham to sacrifice Isaac. This story is so rich, it is one of my favorites. God is revealed as Jehovah-Jireh, our Provider.<br />
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I can't get past Chapter 20 though, there is so much that makes me wonder in this chapter. We read about Abraham telling King Abimelech that Sarah is his sister, just like he did with Pharaoh 25 years earlier. Abraham once again asked Sarah to agree to this so that he would live. He thought he would be killed so that Pharaoh could have Sarah, because she was so beautiful. It didn't go so well, but Abraham was spared and so was Sarah. Here he is doing the same thing again. So King Abimelech of Gerar sent and took Sarah.<br />
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God comes to Abimelech in a dream and tells him what is going on. Abimelech is completely surprised, he had no idea Sarah was married. He even confesses to God that he is a man of integrity and innocent. He appeals to God to hold back His wrath. God says He knows the integrity of his heart and therefore kept him from sinning against God, "lest he touch her".<br />
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This isn't even to the part that wows me, but I have to stop here and make some notes. First, God knows our hearts. He knew that Abimelech's heart was pure. Second, God was able to stop anything from happening between Abimelech and Sarah. There would be no question who the father of Isaac would be in the next chapter. God's plans cannot be thwarted. And the last thing, that breaks my heart, when we sin - it is against God. Genesis 20:6 says, "...I kept you from sinning against Me...". When we sin, we hurt others and ourselves, but ultimately it is God we are offending. Oh boy.<br />
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Back on track. God tells Abimelech to restore Sarah to Abraham. And then he says Abraham will pray for the king and he will live (there is that "life" theme again). This is the first mention of prayer that I have noticed. Some have "called on the name of the Lord", but we haven't seen anyone pray yet. <br />
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When the king follows through, Abraham did indeed pray for the king. This is verse 17: <br />
<i>And Abraham prayed to God; and God healed Abimelech and his wife and his maids, so that they bore children.</i><br />
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Did you notice the progression? God said that Abraham would pray. He prayed. Then God healed. Why did God do this? What would have happened if Abraham didn't pray? God doesn't need our prayers to heal others. (And another side note: the first mention of prayer, is for healing, this also interests me...)<br />
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1 Peter 3:12 says, <i>"For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and His ears are open to their prayer..."</i> Remember back in Genesis 15:6 when Abraham believed in the Lord, and He reckoned it to him as righteousness? And here we are, the eyes of the Lord are on Abraham and He heard his prayer. And God responded.<br />
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Abraham had just made the same mistake he has already made. He was trying to protect himself by saying Sarah was his sister and jeopardizes the lives of many people again. Then he makes excuses as to why he did this. <br />
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We are no different than Abraham, making excuses for our bad behavior. We also are going to stumble along. And yet God wants us to be a part of His story. He invites us in. He wants to hear from us and then He wants us to see Him at work. Opening up the wombs of those women is only something God could do. And as Abraham has a front row seat to see this miracle, He is on the verge of his very own. <br />
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<br />Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-23267378916117628472016-02-15T00:31:00.002-08:002016-02-15T08:10:25.073-08:0040 Day Journey - Day 4 (Hagar)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I'm speaking at a retreat in a couple of months, the theme is <i>Draw Near</i>. As I read the Bible I am a little more aware of the idea of drawing near. What I am finding is there is not a simple equation, or 3 step process in order to Draw Near. God's ways are mysterious. And Genesis perplexes me.<br />
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I read through chapter 19 when Lot's wife turns into a pillar of salt. <i>A Pillar of Salt?</i> What in the world? All I can think about when I see this scene in my head, is a deer or a camel coming by and licking her toes. <br />
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The other mystery is Hagar. The woman seems caught between a rock and a hard place for sure. She is an Egyptian maid to Sarai. There may be a little pressure (self-imposed?), God has promised Abram to be made into a great nation. His descendants would be as numerous as the stars. Yet, they have no children and they are past their child bearing years. Sarai had to do something! (so she figured)<br />
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Her plan? Give her maid to Abram and through her, maybe they could start a family. Abram in all his wisdom agrees. Of course Hagar becomes pregnant and Sarai gets mad. It sounds like this may be a honeymoon baby...not much time passed, Can you imagine how hurtful that would be to Sarai? All these years of trying and yearning for a baby and Hagar becomes pregnant her first try? <br />
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In her anger, Sarai decides to treat Hagar harshly. What does Hagar do? She runs away. Here she is a foreigner and a slave. She is given to her mistress's husband to bear a child. Not because of love, not because she is wanted, but because they need something from her. She gets pregnant and can hardly rejoice in this baby, who will he really belong to anyway? On top of all this, Sarai now treats her horribly. Can you blame her for running away?<br />
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But then God shows up. Genesis 16:7 says, "Now the angel of the LORD found her by a spring of water in the wilderness..." As far as we know, Hagar just ran away. We don't hear her calling to the Lord for help or mercy. She was found as she was running away. God came near.<br />
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There is much more to the story, but one of my favorite parts is when Hagar gives God a name. El Roi. "Thou art a God who sees." And that was enough for her to go back and do what God asked her to do. <br />
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And this is enough. Though I don't always understand what God is doing in my life, or why He allows certain circumstances to take place, I know He sees me. And if He sees me, He cannot be far off. And when I least expect Him, like maybe when I am running away, He is probably poised ready to draw near to me. <br />
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There may not be a simple equation to drawing near to the Lord, but I'm pretty sure it is happening as I spend time in His Word, reading it expectantly, attentively, and humbly.<br />
<br />Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-91070309956588714442016-02-13T09:59:00.002-08:002016-02-13T10:32:33.115-08:0040 Day Journey - Day 3 (he believed)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I only made it through three chapters again today. There is so much packed in these chapters, I am overwhelmed a bit. <br />
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Before I read Genesis 13-15 today, I said my 3 words. Expectantly, attentively, humbly. This is how I approach my time listening to God through His word. There really is a lot in those three chapters. How do I pick one theme/thought for today?<br />
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The one that is the most exciting is in Genesis 15:1<br />
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<i>After these things the word of the LORD came to Abram in a vision, saying, "Do not fear, Abram, I am a shield to you; Your reward shall be very great."</i><br />
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Up until this point the Bible reads, "God said", but this is the first mention of the "word of the Lord". We know from the gospel of John, that the Word became flesh and dwelt among us. So was this Jesus that came to Abram?<br />
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The Lord shows Abram the stars. If Abram were able to count the stars, that would be the number of his descendants. At this point Abram has no children, and is a little old to be having children. This surely seems impossible. Abram's response? Verse 6 says, <i>"Then he believed in the Lord..." </i> Abram didn't believe in the words. He believed in The Word. Jesus. Then the Lord reckoned it to him as righteousness.<br />
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We can only be made righteous by faith in Jesus Christ. Yet this is taking place thousands of years before Jesus is even born! What does it mean to be made righteous? We use that word as an insult sometimes in our culture. "Oh he thinks he's so righteous.", we say of someone that irritates us.<br />
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God alone is righteous, We are counted as righteous through faith in Jesus alone. Our righteousness is based on what Christ did on the cross. Yet this was given to Abram before Christ was made flesh. Wow. I know this is overly simplistic, but I think it basically means we are "made right" before the Lord. We are sinners and have no place before a Holy God. But because of Jesus, we can be in His presence.<br />
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This makes me think of the theme of Day 1 - life and death. The hope of having children is dead for Abram and Sarai. (death) Yet the word of the Lord comes to Abram and says, "one from your own body, he shall be your heir." (life)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmwUJmDy_yi2iRJRMBoy-JtvtPKZcYsOsvswpbg5e3NeY_xwLWK9fGv13HNkOSVqLOwgA8bc3tT_HqBtyaOJ74wgrmJbp_ZgZBG0YOaTAUnXFhD-SbeKPlSXpFPCL8kTHWQ1M-LPTS7b0/s1600/In+darkness+God%2527s+truth+shines+most+clear..jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmwUJmDy_yi2iRJRMBoy-JtvtPKZcYsOsvswpbg5e3NeY_xwLWK9fGv13HNkOSVqLOwgA8bc3tT_HqBtyaOJ74wgrmJbp_ZgZBG0YOaTAUnXFhD-SbeKPlSXpFPCL8kTHWQ1M-LPTS7b0/s320/In+darkness+God%2527s+truth+shines+most+clear..jpg" width="320" /></a>In the book of Romans, we read more insight into Abraham's life. Romans 4:17 says that Abraham believed in the one "who gives life to the dead and calls into existence the things that do not exist." In that dark night as the Lord showed Abram the stars, Abram believed. God's promise was clear. As clear as those stars.<br />
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Maybe that is what God is asking of us now. In our dark moments, will we choose to believe that He can call into existence the things that do not exist? Our hopes, our dreams, our future are in His hands. May His truth shine clear to you today.<br />
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<br />Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-70644616526341578382016-02-11T23:39:00.000-08:002016-02-12T09:13:30.204-08:0040 Day Journey - Day 2 (Go West)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I made it through Genesis 10-12 today. I couldn't stop reading Chapter 11 though. A few things caught my eye, so I reread it several times. <br />
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Genesis 10 lists the genealogies of Noah. Chapter 11 opens up with these words:<br />
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<i>Now the whole earth used the same language and the same words. And it came about as they journeyed east, that they found a plain in the land of Shinar and settled there. </i><br />
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I am not sure, but from the sounds of it, it seems that all these families traveled together and basically stuck together. That sounds nice, except back in Chapter 9 verse 1, God clearly gives a command after getting off the ark. <br />
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<i>And God blessed Noah and his sons and said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth."</i><br />
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They got the fruitful and multiple part down, but had not filled the earth. They just formed their own little club and stayed together. You can know their hearts a little as you read further. They say, "<b>Come, let us</b> build bricks..." and then again, "<b>Come, let us</b> build for ourselves a city...". You know why they wanted to do this? Verse 4 continues, "...let us make for ourselves a name; lest we be scattered abroad over the face of the whole earth." This is like the ultimate show of pride, we can all recognize this quickly can't we?<br />
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God had blessed Noah and gave him pretty clear instructions - to fill the earth. And yet these sons of Noah decided they should stick together and make a name for themselves lest they actually do what God commanded? This is not going to end well.<br />
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The only name that is to be made famous is the name of the Lord. In fact Proverbs 18:10 says, <i>The name of the Lord is strong tower; the righteous man runs into it and is safe</i>. But instead of obeying God, the One whose name is "Strong Tower", they try to build a tower of brick to make a name for themselves.<br />
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But God is sovereign, in control over all the earth. You know what He says? "<b>Come, let Us</b> go down and there confuse their language that they may not understand one another's speech." Verse 8 says, "So the Lord scattered them abroad from there over the face of the whole earth; and they stopped building the city."<br />
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They ended up filling the earth, but not through blessing and God's protection, but through God's discipline. Another interesting theory to consider...going east in biblical times is often associated with going towards exile or captivity or away from the Lord's blessing. These families intentionally headed east, they intentionally built a city and tower for their own fame. They had a choice they could obey God and head straight into His blessing or they could head "east" and receive His discipline instead. They chose east.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKvCWskNoQTY3U7Z_mxa723HRxJj1pG5qAMdElcZ7T028WRizcL41HTjMwLLXN78M3oBF7XoD7xhJstGmcoMm9GpBuyE_CB1fNo5BeNvNm3kXkcVnGou-D5cWUP61dvQVBrDkeUgKQUqs/s1600/tower.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKvCWskNoQTY3U7Z_mxa723HRxJj1pG5qAMdElcZ7T028WRizcL41HTjMwLLXN78M3oBF7XoD7xhJstGmcoMm9GpBuyE_CB1fNo5BeNvNm3kXkcVnGou-D5cWUP61dvQVBrDkeUgKQUqs/s200/tower.jpg" width="200" /></a>What are you choosing? Are you living inside of God's commands, being cared for and making His name famous? Or are you making your own plans and decisions, trying to make a name for yourself? Let me give some advice (learned the hard way). Go west young man (and woman)...straight into your Strong Tower and be safe.<br />
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<br />Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-19459511009617981672016-02-10T23:39:00.000-08:002016-02-10T23:39:52.950-08:0040 Day Journey 2016 - Day 1 (Life and Death)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Last year for Lent I decided to spend one hour each day listening to God. No agenda, no Bible Study, or other distraction. Just listening. I ended up also blogging about that hour and what God revealed. It was a rich time and I am forever changed by those sacred moments. The intimacy with the Lord was what this parched soul needed. <br />
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I was nervous to do the same thing this year. What if He didn't show up (like that is an option, of course He would!). Frankly, it was hard work also. I had to carve out an hour of my already busy days, and then it took hours into the night to blog about the experience. And I am lazy...I wasn't sure it was in me to do again! So I decided to pray. What did the Lord have for me this year?<br />
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I felt the Lord was asking me to get in His Word. I want to hear Him, and I know He speaks through His Word. So I am beginning with Genesis, and then will go to John. If I have time I hope to make it through Hosea also. And I committed to read the Bible expectantly, attentively, and humbly (thank you Richard Foster - this makes such a difference). <br />
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So today, Ash Wednesday, I began my 2nd 40 Day Journey leading up to Easter.<br />
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I took notes as I read to see if a theme or thought emerged. What I noticed was life and death. In the beginning the earth was formless and void, darkness was over the surface of the deep (death); and the Spirit of God was moving over the surface (life). The Lord God formed man from dust (death) and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being (life). We move ahead to Cain killing Abel (death) and then God giving Adam and Eve another son, Seth (life). This cycle continues for generations. My take away? God gives life. God breathes life into us. God IS life! Am I in despair over a situation? Am I hopeless in any area of my life? I can ask God and He will be pleased to breathe new life into the dead parts of my heart. What good news. But how can we as believers experience this?<br />
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I am still unearthing this truth, but there are some guys that give us a hint. In Genesis 5:22 we read that, "Enoch walked with God". And in Genesis 6:9, "...Noah walked with God." I might be more in tune to this since we just studied this in our Tuesday morning Bible Study. We discussed the word "walk", why that word is used. We decided it was an action word, it was steady, when walking "with" God it may have a sense of keeping in step with Him, going where He goes. <br />
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Back up in Genesis 4:26, after Adam's grandson Enosh was born the Bible says, "then men began to call upon the name of the Lord." But we don't see anyone walking with God until Enoch, generations later. I am taking some liberty here, but I wonder if God was pretty excited about Enoch. Before him, men called on the name of the Lord, but Enoch walked with God! There is a definite difference. I imagine shoulder to shoulder (figuratively), a nearness, having conversations both speaking and listening. This is a relationship.<br />
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I love Genesis 5:24. The NIV says, "Enoch walked faithfully with God; then he was no more, because God took him away." The verses leading up to this share how his ancestors "died". Enoch was "no more", because God took him away. Wow.<br />
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I imagine Enoch walking so closely with the Lord that one day God just leaned over and scooped him right up. People were like, "Where's Enoch? He was just right here?" That is not death, that is LIFE! That is God. He offers life to all of us, and abundantly as we walk with Him. <br />
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Do you just call on the name of the Lord, do you lift a prayer when you have a need or do you walk faithfully with the Lord? Is it an active relationship, or is it dead? Ask God to breathe life into your relationship with Him. Oh I want to live in such a way, that one day, I am no more. <br />
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<br />Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-53939747147913792992016-01-04T22:43:00.000-08:002016-01-04T22:46:21.025-08:00New Year - New SeasonI have always loved the changing of seasons, spring to summer, summer to fall. There is something about entering into a new season that brings a hint of hope. This weekend at church a video played with inspirational quotes to set our hearts right for the New Year. This one I had to look up and read again:<br />
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I love word pictures. They cause me to pause and wonder for awhile. I don't know that I fully understand this quote, but something about it makes me want to sit awhile and think on last year and consider 2016. </div>
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It is as if January 1st is a switch waiting to be flipped. Out with the old and in with the new. I sometimes wish this were true of May 18 or October 23 or any other random day of the year when I desire a new beginning. </div>
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This is a new season, 2016. I feel like I have this big eraser to wipe off last year's disappointments and failures and I can write down fresh hopes for the tomorrows of this year. What will be written on the pages of this year, what voice will emerge?</div>
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As I linger a little longer over 2015, past those regrets, I see God. He is in the funerals and in the weddings. He is in the sicknesses and in the good health. He is in the lean times and in the times of abundance. He has answered thousands of prayers. I see Him more clearly than the year before.</div>
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I want to embrace all that the Lord has planned for this coming year. I am guessing He has planned some hard times sprinkled in among the mundane days and happy moments. It is all for our good and for His glory. So this year, 2016, I commit to Hosea 6:3:</div>
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<i>Let us know, let us press on to know the Lord; his going out is as sure as the dawn; he will come to us as the showers, as the spring rains that water the earth. </i></div>
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When life gets hard, instead of flailing about, I will choose to press on. And not in the "spin your wheels to exhaustion" pressing on, but by leaning in closer to know the Lord in the midst of my circumstances. All else will be worthless, rubbish, meaningless unless this is first. </div>
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When January 1, 2017 rolls around I will rejoice once again in seeing the Lord even more clearly. As the NIV translation of Hosea 6:3 says, "as surely as the sun rises, He will appear". This is my promise, He will not fail me. Here is to great expectations and renewed hope for 2016!</div>
Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-59497067311482647832015-12-01T23:13:00.001-08:002015-12-21T23:04:02.875-08:00What is the answer?<div class="MsoNormal">
These last two years has been marked with loss for our
family. On the surface, the obvious ones
are the loss of my aunt two years ago, followed by the loss of my mom, her only
sibling, four months later. And just 4
days ago, my father-in-law left this earth for his home in heaven. In the time between these deaths, my little
circle of friends and I have been surrounded by many other losses. Not to a physical death necessarily (though
that has happened). There has been a
death of a dream. A mom’s persistent
cancer. Unmet expectations. Dementia. We grieve bad choices our kids
make, our hearts ache for something more than the mundane that seems to be our
lives, we get consumed by fear because of current events. What is our response? How do we handle all that life throws our way?
Just yesterday another friend shared devastating news that left me breathless
and weeping. Life is just not fair. It seems
to be a grand idea to move to Montana and hide in a cabin alone, untouched by
the cares of this world. Wrap up my little broken heart and keep it from
experiencing loss or pain, and hide it under my pillow. That seems reasonable right? <o:p></o:p></div>
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I have been making my way through the book, <u>A Grace
Disguised</u>. The author Gerald Sittser
experienced horrific loss when a car accident resulted in the loss of his mother,
his wife, and his young daughter. This is from the chapter I am reading: <o:p></o:p></div>
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<i>“The problem of choosing to love again is that the choice to
love means living under the constant threat of further loss. But the problem of choosing not to love is
that the choice to turn from love means imperiling the life of the soul, for
the soul thrives in an environment of love.
Soul-full people love, soul-less people do not. If people want their soul to grow through
loss, whatever the loss is, they must eventually decide to love even more
deeply than they did before. They must
respond to the loss by embracing love with renewed energy and commitment.”</i><o:p></o:p></div>
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Did you catch that? <i>The soul thrives in an environment of love</i>. Is your soul downcast? Choose love.
Are you experiencing grief so deep your heart aches? Let love revive your heart. Do the cares of this world blur your vision of
your purpose? Your mission, if you choose, is love. What if the cure for a
broken heart is to expose it to the possibility of more pain? It seems
contradictory to our human nature. We
hurt, so our natural response would be to choose not to love again. But I wonder if God’s remedy is to love even
deeper, even wider. <o:p></o:p></div>
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1 John 4:11 says, “Beloved, if God so loved us, we also
ought to love one another.” We have broken God’s heart over and over and
over again, from the very beginning. No one’s heart can be more broken than
His. Yet He always chooses love. And how deep the Father’s love for us! <o:p></o:p></div>
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So with the full knowledge that my heart will break again,
that there will be further loss, I am going to choose love. I am going to stay in relationships with
broken-hearted people, because God is near to the broken-hearted and I want to
be near God. I will keep imperfect
relationships and choose forgiveness because God has forgiven imperfect me. And on days that I want to run away and hide
I will choose love, because He first loved me.
That little cabin in Montana probably has bats anyway.</div>
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Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-280292629883315338.post-77616053743033372012015-07-28T03:00:00.000-07:002015-07-28T03:00:04.365-07:00Come to MeA few months back we attended a fund raiser for some friends heading back to be full time missionaries in Niger. While Andy was sharing his story, he mentioned something that I have been thinking about ever since.<br />
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He said that often when missionaries share their stories they share how God has said "Go" (referring to the Great Commission). For Andy though, he heard, "Come to Me". It was as if God was at work in Niger and was calling the Gray family back to be a part of what He was already doing. I'm sure I probably totally reworded his message...but it is close.<br />
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Matthew 11:28 came to mind quickly, "Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest." I often have thought of this verse to apply only when we are exhausted from overworking. But what if it is a continual beckoning? The longer I live this life, the more frequent the burdens and with increasing weight. There are more decisions that need to be made. More wisdom is needed.<br />
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At this moment I am sitting in a dark room listening to the beat of an IV pump . It is 2:30am and my dad is finally resting from an exhausting day of tests and xrays. I don't think anyone told me this is what our lives would look like in this season. My mom should be calling to set a Starbucks date with my daughter. My dad should be telling us stories of Ohana in Hawaii. Instead my mom is in heaven with her sister and my dad is saying night-night from the hospital bed.<br />
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This moment, this quiet night, is just one in a string of heavy-laden moments. Yet I am at rest. St. Augustine has this quote, "Thou hast made us for Thyself, and our heart is restless until it finds its rest in Thee."<br />
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Through these trials, these sufferings, God has been my rest. I continue to come to Him, for without Him I am restless. I have learned over the last several years that there is purpose in our struggles. God is waiting for us to come to Him. Sometimes all the way to Niger and sometimes in a hospital room in the middle of the night. As we put our trust and hope in Him, He directs our paths straight into His arms and straight into His purposes for our lives. What better place to find true rest?Nancyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09967435295498040166noreply@blogger.com5